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The Bureau of Whimsy
The Bureau of Whimsy

Kitchen Band Practice

Field Manual EF-24

Your elf forms a band with pots, pans and wooden spoons and leaves a setlist of made-up song titles. Funny, quick and wonderfully noisy by morning.

Set-up time
5 minutes
Morning-after tidy
No mess

Supplies

Requisition slip
  • A pot or two
  • Wooden spoons
  • Paper for a setlist

Setting the scene

  1. 1Turn a couple of pots upside down on the kitchen floor like drums.
  2. 2Prop wooden spoons against them and sit the elf behind the drum kit.
  3. 3Write a setlist of made-up titles, like “The Snowflake Shuffle” and “Ode to Marshmallows”.
Tonight's note · Form EF-3
The Bureau of Whimsy
Elf Field Operations
Watching Kindly. Reporting Daily.
Field Elf DispatchWorkshop Annex 7, North Pole
Case No.EF-2026-43745
FormEF-3
IssuedDecember 14, 2026
Re: Nightly Field Dispatch

Dear Maya and Leo,

The North Pole Kitchen Band is on tour! We practised all night, very quietly, so nobody would wake up. Our first concert is at breakfast. Tickets are free and earmuffs are optional.

Today’s mission: find me tomorrow morning. (I’m getting sneakier.)

★ BUREAU OF WHIMSY ★ OFFICIAL SEAL ★ BUREAU OF WHIMSY ★ OFFICIAL SEAL

Elf-ishly yours,

Field Elf Pip
Field Elf, First Class
Elf Field Operations

P.S. I’m moving to a new spot tonight. Start guessing now.

Filed in accordance with the Whimsy Act. Please keep in a safe and magical place.

Form EF-3 · Rev. 2026 · Page 1 of 1

Scan to verify authenticity
DISPATCHEDDEC 14 2026 · EF DESK
The note your elf leaves, printed on Elf Field Operations letterhead. Filed here for Maya; yours carries your child’s name.Print this notePlan all 24 nights

More scenes like this one

All easy ideas
Cross-references

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    5 minNo mess

  • GoodbyeFunny

    Waiting for the Sleigh

    Your elf waits on the windowsill with a sign reading “Sleigh pickup: tonight” and a carrot for the reindeer. A gentle, funny goodbye for Christmas Eve.

    5 minNo mess

  • Toddler-friendlyFunny

    Toy Yoga Class

    Your elf leads a yoga class for the stuffed animals, everyone on washcloth mats in a stretchy pose. Funny and calming, and fun for little ones to copy.

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Paperwork that pairs with this scene

Elf Field Operations
  • Form EF-3Free

    Elf Nightly Note

    A short note from the elf for tonight: a kindness mission, a joke, a countdown or an explanation for this morning's mess.

    Letter
  • Form EF-2Free

    Elf Incident Report

    When the elf gets up to something: an official report with offense, evidence, witness statement and a (very lenient) ruling.

    Official form
  • Form EF-1Free

    Elf Arrival Letter

    Your elf's first-morning letter: introductions, the nightly-report routine and a few house rules, all very official.

    Letter

Scene set. Note printed. Bedtime.

Print the note with your child's name in about thirty seconds. Classic wording is always free.

Print this noteFile an incident report